Diets Suck

When Diana and Michael rescued me I weighed 12 ¼ lbs. Now I weigh 13 ½ lbs. Almost a 10% increase in 6 months. We had no idea because I carry the weight so well…  Hey, be nice now. Who you calling fat?

I do not get people food. Sure, I get cheese. Cheese is not people food, it’s a training tool and Jeff said to keep it coming when I see another dog…waaa haaa haaa…I see a lot of dogs (some real - some not) on my evening walks…

I get special, just for me, duck and potato dry kibble. I also get one small dog treat cookie when we get finish our walk. It’s all right. I have no complaints.

!!!!!!! EXCEPT ONE !!!!!!!

On the side of the food bag is a chart for how much to feed me. It says ½ cup 2 times a day. Diana thought that sounded like a lot. My friend, Katey the Pug, only gets ¼ cup 2 times a day. She weighs 23 lbs. I did the math and nearly fainted when I saw the answer to that weight-to-kibble equation.

The extra weight has caused problems that I’ll bark about later. So - Diana cut me off. GRRRRRRR.  Oh, yeah and a few more GRRRRRRRRRRRs just because.

Let’s just say I now get a scrawny amount of kibble - a very light sized ¼ cup for breakfast and another ¼ for dinner. We also doubled how long our walk is. That part I really like. We walk almost 45 minutes each night plus we stop at the neighborhood park so I can run back and forth on the grass for at least 10 minutes.

We are supposed to go back to the vet in two weeks to see how much I’ve lost.

I tell you right now - I’m starving and I’ve lost enough, thank you very much. I’m working the after walk exhaustion angle first. If they don’t buy that I’ll work the pitiful eyes routine. I’ll let you know which trick works best so you can use it if you ever have to.

^ . . ^ Woof!!!!



"Akunamatata, Sasha.  Akunamatata."

Diana said that to me last night.

We are all right once again.

I'm sure it was my doing - aren't you?

^ . . ^ Woof!!!!!


Sometimes Being Cute Is Almost Enough

Last night my people were not happy with each other. This is very, very unusual.

At first, I ignored their discussion. I didn’t hear the words “Cheese” or “Car Ride”, so need to stop playing with my new fur bone.

But things were not easy. I felt tension that I could not ignore. I stopped playing and stood next to them. I looked from one to the other, whined quietly and pawed the air towards each other, doing my very dog best to catch their attention.

Shockingly, they didn’t acknowledge me. Ok, fine. Time to pull out my big weapon - demanding plus cute.

I crept between them, my ears flat, and my tail slowly wagging. Once inserted, one human on my right, one human on my left, I turned over and showed my belly. Sure, for some this is a sign of submission and a big doggie no-no. For me, last night, it was a request for them to notice me and realize that they were upsetting me.

Eventually, they acknowledged me and realized that I was upset. They stopped, scratched my belly and said I was a sweet, sensitive, smart dog and they were sorry they upset me. That’s all well and good but I wanted to know I was successful too.

Each human wandered off to do their own projects, back to their normal selves. I travelled back and forth between them, unsettled, unsure.

Tonight should be better. If not, I know a few more tricks that I can use.

^ . . ^ Woof?


Find Out What You Are And Be That

Dear Diana and Michael:

In case you haven’t noticed, I am a terrier (a darned cute one at that, I might add). I am not a retriever. If you want the ball so badly - go get it yourself.

I don’t ask you to dig big holes in the back yard for me. I don’t ask you to bark at squirrels for me. I don’t ask you roll around in stinky weird stuff at the ocean for me. I do all that super cool stuff for myself.

Oh, sure, it’s fabulous to go to the park with you. I’m happy to beg, with my intense whining and annoying running back and forth to the door, every night. We have an awesome time walking to the park. How many flowers do I stop to sniff then look back at you and wag my tail because they smell wonderful? How many kids on bikes do I yell at? How many other dogs do I strive to intimidate? Hopefully - as many as possible…

But once at the park I do not want to chase the stupid ball. I do not want to chase the even more stupid Frisbee. I want to hang out with you. I want to practice my extraordinarily cute tricks that reap me significant cheese rewards and I want to roll around in the grass.

That’s it. That’s all it takes to be me.


Accept No Substitutes

Diana says I’m a Bossy Babe (she actually said a word that sounds like itchy). Absolutely I am. How you going to know what’s going on if you don’t get into everyone’s business? I got left behind once in my life already. It’s not going to happen again.

Sometimes after dinner, we get on the computer. Because I MUST know what is going on, I like to sit on her lap and help. When we are working on my stuff, I wag my tail and stand really close to the screen to see what’s going on. I’m very interested and do a lot of editing for her. But sometimes she plays a game with a character that she designed to look like me. It’s cute, brown, has big ears, and does goofy stuff. Yep, that’s me all right.

I hate this game. If you want to play with me - play with me. I’m right here. My leash is always in sight and my favorite fur bone is always close by. I bark and growl and generally make a huge fuss until she stops playing the game and we do what I want.

If she thinks super deluxe hard, Diana will realize that doing what I want is really what she wants. Yep, the Boss is rarely wrong.

^ . . ^ Woof


It's Too Darn Hot

As it is 87 degrees in the Girl Room this evening - I'm taking a break from being cute and funny.  Right now, I'm just flat out in front of the fan.  

Bark at you on Wednesday.

^ . ^ Pant! Pant!


Blanket Wrangler

It is very busy at our house these days. We are working on important stuff. We are so busy that Michael cancelled the cable TV because we just don’t watch TV anymore.

Michael goes to his boy room after dinner. He is very happy without TV because he likes listening to music much better. He’s been doing top secret important stuff, including whistling and playing with paper - lots of paper. I think its top secret important stuff because I’m not allowed in his boy room. I don’t mind because Diana and I have the girl room just for us. We go in there after our walk in the evening and do girl stuff.

Girl stuff is important stuff too and it’s not secret. I’m barking about what we are doing from the end of my leash, hoping to reach every corner of our world.

We are making blankets for rescue dogs. We are crocheting soft, warm blankets to give to the fabulous people at Northwest International Pet Rescue (NWIPR). NWIPR has agreed to send our blankets along with the newly adopted dogs to their forever homes. NWIPR rescued me and I want to pay them back as much as I doggie can.

Rescue dogs often have nothing in life - just their dignity and the hope of a forever home. Dogs don’t really care about stuff. But a few toys, a safe collar or harness and leash usually are the bare stuff necessities (Fur sure).

We aren’t talking bare stuff necessities here. No way. We are talking new beginnings and grand starts. We are talking about the rest of our lives. Everyone needs something special of their own to take with them on that journey. I am helping.

Actually, I have THE most important job of all. I test drive each newly finished blanket before it is carefully washed and sent off. I sit down, I stretch out, I roll around on and I get wrapped up in each blanket to make sure all the knots hold and the stitches stay in place.

Once I give the paws up, the blanket gets a bath (oooh, yuck. I don’t like baths) then heads out - destined for a good life. This makes me the Head Blanket Wrangler. Cool.

Want one of your own? Slip me some cheese and we’ll talk.

Bark at you later.

^ . . ^ Woof!!!!!


What Did You Do This Weekend?

I took care of Diana.  She has a really bad cold.  We took a long nap together (Yeah, I actually got to sleep on the bed).

Diana says she is feeling much better because I was such a good pup.  She felt so much better that we went for a super long walk.  Didn't see any other dogs on my walk so no "cheese training".  Oh, well.  Maybe tomorrow.

I like being needed.  It's a three bark feeling.

^ . . ^ 



Skool Daze - Part II

Jeff Tinsley is awesome. He is the owner of Sound Animals. He is my special teacher. He is helping me overcome my super-duper anger at other dogs when I’m on a leash. He knows a ton about dogs. He likes me and I like him. Last week we went to Green Lake to work on things…

Diana and Michael talked with Jeff for a while about stuff (Me mostly). I watched for other dogs and boy did I find them. They were coming at me from every direction. I wanted to rush the dogs walking on the path around the lake but Jeff made me sit and be quiet up by the parking lot. WTH!

Oh, I get it. If I sit nicely I get cheese and we move a little closer to the lake.

Ok, fine. I was on to him and his cheesy ways. I could do this.

Two from the left - one a shepherd and one a beagle.

One from the right - a terrier yapping at me. Why was he yapping at me? I didn’t do anything.

More from behind - just kids on bikes. No biggie unless they get close. Getting close. Getting closer.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Arghhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Back to the parking lot. Drink of cold water and a few moments of “quiet time”.

Peaceful, calm, controlled. READY - SET - GO.

Strollers. Oh, right. We don’t bark at babies. We like babies. Sorry.

Took us nearly an hour to move 100 feet, to a bench in the shade, underneath a beautiful tree.  We were about half way to the lake trail. Diana was surprised we made it that far. She didn’t think we would. I was trying really, really hard and Jeff said I was “a good dog”. Diana and Michael agreed.  That made so happy I almost wagged my tail.  Almost.

Incoming at 2:00 - 2 pugs. What? Don’t they know I’m here? 
Hey, Hey, Hey.
Oh, right. Quiet. Cheese. Yum.

Incoming at 9:00 - A small shi-tzu. He’s wagging his tail. Back-off fuzz ball.
Hey, Hey, Hey.
Oh, right. Quiet. Cheese. Yum.

Cheese, give me cheese before I loose my cool. I’m loosing it. Ok, I got it back. I sat, perfectly good with my feet together and held my tongue.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Arghhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Red Alert . Def Con 4. All Shields up. Full Battle Gear. Whoot Whoot Whoot Alarms Alarms

Michael said, “Looks like she’s lost it for good this time, guys.” Yep. I was a goner. Diana scooped me up and back to the parking lot we went. I was a shivering bundle of nerves, my tail was high up on my back and my fur was puffed out as far as it would go. I think my vision was blurry too…

Slowly, with my back to the lake trail, I regained my cool. Nice drink of cold water. Some tummy and ear rubs and I started to calm down. Peaceful, calm, controlled.

Jeff decided to have me meet his dog Neeka. Sure, why not. The day couldn’t get much worse than it already was, as far as I was concerned. Bring it on. I’ll meet her. But I won’t like her.

Apparently, Neeka is a wonder dog. A black lab Jeff got as a rescue when she was 6 months old. Perfect. Trained. Beautiful. Calm. Talented up the wazoo with tricks and manners. Jeff thinks she’d be a good influence. She is supposed to be my mentor. Right, we’ll see.

Neeka walked towards us and settled in the shade about 15 feet from me.
Hey, Hey, Hey. Don’t ignore me. Hey, Hey, Hey.
Oh, right. Quiet. Cheese. Yum.

Diana let me get closer. Sniff sniff sniff.
Hey, Hey, Hey.
Oh, right. Quiet Cheese. Yum.

Diana let me get even closer. Sniff Sniff sniff.
Oh, wrong.

Sure, I get that, but I didn’t actually touch her. I just bit towards her. No cheese or a “good dog” with that move. Neeka growled at me too. Ah, overkill. I get it…

Diana let me try getting closer again. Sniff Sniff Sniff
No bark - no growl.

CHEESE. Lots of cheese and full-on “GOOD SASHA”


Jeff decided that was it. He’d seen enough and we were all worn out. We walked back to the cars together. I let Neeka walk beside me, as long as she didn’t try any funny business with sniffing my tail. Jeff thinks I can become a calmer dog with lots and lots of practice. He is very hopeful, but I may never manage to be a “dog park’ kind of dog. Diana thinks there may just be enough cheese in the world to get me trained into tolerating dogs near me when we walk around the neighborhood.

I say - bring it on. Let’s test this cheese training stuff to the limits. But, we better stop at the store first for more cheese.

^ . . ^ Woof!