10/18/2010

Dog Math Formula #2

Note to Self:
STOP RATTING YOURSELF OUT!

I decided that getting into the garbage and enjoying an old, dried out cheese stick was a brilliant idea - my best one of the day, in fact. Since I was already in the mood, I also enjoyed creamy delicious butter residue on a wax paper wrapper.

Dog Math Formula #2
Dog + self perceived good idea + go for it attitude = regret

Right in the middle of enjoying the butter (a first cousin to cheese, by the way), Diana called me.

“Pish? Where are you? It's way too quiet…What are you up to?”

Uh-Oh. Quick. Think fast.

Consider running away?          No, can’t open the door by myself
Consider hiding?                    No, pink doggie bed is way to exposed
Consider groveling?                Yes, just get it over with

Slowly, regretfully, I crawled up the stairs, dragging out the last few moments before I was going to seriously be in for it out as long as possible. The second I saw Diana, I threw myself at her mercy. She’s full of that wacky mercy stuff…

“Hmmmm. What did you do?”

Maybe if I did my best doggy army crawl, flattened my ears against my head, whined, then rolled over and exposed my sweet tummy I could avoid getting a lecture.  From the top of the stairs, I watched Diana go down and discover my rash, basically not-so-good decision making.

“PISH! Get down here right now.”

Ack. No way. No how. I was not going to go downstairs and face the music. I ran into the Girl Room and settled in (I refuse to call it hiding) behind the pillows on the day bed.

Stomp. Stomp. Stomp. Back up she came, grumbling all the way. Ooooooh, I was really going to get it.

“Pish. What are we going to do with you? Are you a garbage hound?  I guess we’ll just have to love you and give you cheese more often to stop this affection you have for garbage. Now, come downstairs with me and help me clean up your mess on the carpet.” 

Really? Really?  I forgot that this was my new family. I was not going to be punished for breaking rules that I didn’t even know existed. I’m still not fully used to all this trust and love stuff.

So, I quietly sat next to Diana as she scrubbed the carpet and decided that next time, and you know there will be a next time, I’m going to remember to enjoy my special finds on the kitchen floor rather than the living room carpet…

Win - Win for both of us, don’t you think?

^ . . ^ Woof


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